WARNING: Explicit language and sexual content. If you’re uncomfortable with any of the aforementioned – we highly suggest you read something else.
Written by Anonymous
This particular Public Service Announcement connects well with the sentiments I articulated in my very first piece (and my second), “The Muslim fuck boy, much like all the others, have their own agenda. This particular breed is clandestine in their approach and has the added benefit of the illusion of religious piety to cover his misdemeanors.”
Clandestine is, perhaps, too kind a word for these rats. In any case, these two events and men deserve to be in this piece together because they both found it suitable to exploit religion in order to benefit their fantasies and desires. The portfolio of fuckery continues, so let me get straight to the juicy stuff!
Fuck Boy #5: The Fake Muslim
This is a very recent incident. So, here’s to you Mr. S. Because yes, I am writing about our interactions.
This lanky, but trendy looking guy was, on the surface, really, really sweet. I met him on a Muslim dating website (any guesses which one?). We seemed to have a lot in common, particularly, our love of travel and adventures. A keen snowboarder and motorbike enthusiast, he fascinated me with his varied interests and general knowledge of almost all things.
I should point out that he was, in fact, a white guy; as in Caucasian, which is not my usual type. I like exotic, ethnic guys, of any ethnicity! Regardless of his paleness, I was impressed with his commitment to Islam, as he explained he was the only person in his family that was “Islamically inclined.” I found this commitment to Islam very endearing. In his profile, he described himself as a practicing Muslim, who didn’t smoke, drink alcohol, or party.
Being local to each other made meeting a little quicker and very casual. At this meeting, it dawned on me to ask him when he had taken his Shahada and at which mosque. After observing him fumble over his words, I sensed there was something amiss and I fired questions at him in order to pin him down. It finally came out that he had never taken his shahada! He was not a Muslim – and had no intention of converting!
As infuriating and disconcerting as his revelations were, I managed to keep calm and didn’t immediately tell him to “fuck off,” but I did politely make my excuses and leave. Later that day, after receiving several missed calls and messages, I finally had a phone conversation with him. He explained that his fascination (read: creepy obsession) with Muslim women led him to Muslim dating sites. He gushed on and on about how ladylike, modest, and (most importantly for him) “untouched” Muslim women are. Unlike his peers from his own cultural background, he wanted a woman who would only ever experience him as a sexual partner.
He gushed on and on about how ladylike, modest, and (most importantly for him) “untouched” Muslim women are.
If his intentions were less abhorrent and not solely motivated by sexual fantasies, I could almost forgive them. But the truth was that this man had no interest in Islam, only in the manifestation of the positive attributes Islam provides to women (and men). He didn’t understand that the women he was attracted to were the product of their faith and in order to love them he would need to love their faith Islam. After satisfying my curiosity in our phone conversation, I applied standard practice: Block and Delete!
Fuck Boy #6: The Convenient Muslim
I really liked this guy, and for that reason alone, I will not go into describing him at all. Despite the initial reciprocated and immensely strong attraction, connection, and all other factors being reasonably well in place, this guy turned out to be a fuck boy of mammoth proportions. We had mutually agreed that rushing into marriage was not an option for us. My reason for this was career-motivated and, truthfully, because I needed time “to get to know him” which turned out to be a wise decision. For him, he was previously married and not willing to “take any risks.” This left us both, but particularly him, in a dilemma. Why, you ask? Well, because he wanted to have sex. I was not going to provide the premarital sex he wanted, therefore, he came up with a genius idea (according to him).
A secret nikkah – which would be temporary, if we needed it to be. He excitedly explained his plan to me over dinner, as if it was the invention of the wheel. His enthusiasm was a stab to my integrity and I was left speechless. I couldn’t verbally respond, so I collected my things and left the restaurant. I’m not going to go into detail of what happened next, but you can fill in the blanks. He followed me out and an inappropriate public street scene ensued.
The lack of respect he had for me, and himself, but most importantly, for his religion, was vile and utterly exposing of his true character. He didn’t care about the sanctity of nikkah, he didn’t have any intention in honoring the meaning of nikkah in the presence of Allah. All he cared about was the loophole he had found to get me to have sex. He had no moral dilemma in having premarital sex. It was to gratify my restrictions that he was manipulating religion, and the fact that he saw no issue with this was most unnerving. For him, entering a mosque to recite words from our scared book in the presence of Allah was merely a means to an end and, ultimately, a matter of convenience.
He excitedly explained his plan to me over dinner, as if it was the invention of the wheel.
The Fake Muslim failed to realize the women he was/is fantasizing about have attributes from a religion he does not respect or has/is not willing to adopt. Yet, he sought and “loved” all aspects of that religion which exist in Muslim women, while declaring the religion (Islam) “too restrictive” to his fuckery, clearly. However, he (for me) can almost be forgiven because he’s oblivious to the truth of the religion he’s exploiting.
The Convenient Muslim belonged to a faith which he clearly didn’t fully respect and found it appropriate to pick up and put down religion at his convenience, abusing aspects of it in order to benefit his sexual desires. Secrecy and temporary are words that are in direct contradiction to the concept of nikkah (marriage), not to mention the betrayal to the family and friends that are involved in this. I was old enough and experienced enough to recognize that what he was asking me to do was wrong, Islamically and morally. I fear for all those women/girls and even men who don’t know any better and get roped into convenient nikkahs and temporary marriages.
Whether it’s pretending to be a Muslim or using religion for their convenience, these fuck boys feel justified in their actions because gratifying their desires is all they care about. For these fuck boys, religion, faith, and spirituality are purely reduced to loopholes and functionalities that can be exploited as and when needed, sadly.
My message to the women, young girls and even men is please be careful. Be wise, talk to people around you, take your time, let things unfold naturally, and ALWAYS have your fuckery radar on.