Growing up in a Muslim home where the Arab culture took precedence over many aspects of my upbringing, it didn’t take long for me to see that there were a great many things that my brothers could do that I, as a girl, could not. If you were raised like me, as I can tell many of my readers were, (based off the comments you leave under my “Mama” videos), you too can remember all the times your brother got away with things you would have never been able to get away with. Like – staying out late, talking back, saying the word that almost puts your dad into a coma, “No!” etc. etc.
Now, for those who weren’t raised in an Arab household, you may be asking: “Why are the girls treated differently?” And my answer is always the same, “Because culturally the family reputation and name falls on the girl. Not the boy!” As women, we have higher expectations set on us by our families, culture, and communities, because the faults of the daughter in Arab culture, reflect highly on the family as a whole. Talk about a constant guilt card, ehh?! Now what many families like this don’t seem to grasp, is that Islamically, the family reputation can be tarnished by a boy (man) as much as it can by a girl (woman). Let me give you an example:
Girl gets caught dating – She’s a hoe, from a hoe family, with a hoe lifestyle – Did I mention she’s a hoe?
Guy gets caught dating – What do you expect? He’s a man! Men have needs and what do you want him to do? Hold off? The travesty!
Girl gets caught dating – It’s a sin!
Guy gets caught dating – It’s a sin!
And that, folks, is where culture and religion have been misconstrued, even among Arabs Muslim’s themselves.
Now these videos are in no way, shape, or form meant to dis my beloved culture. I’m about as proud of an Arab as a girl can get. I’m just also proud of being a Muslim and I know that in Islam, women have a lot more rights than what’s afforded to us in this patriarchal culture. Unfortunately though, many women coddle and encourage this behavior in men, too – which is the reason I decided to use a mother, instead of a father for these videos. That and because drawing on a full beard every week was leading to acne breakouts that even Neutrogena couldn’t help.
Until next time… Stay FABULOUS!